A drop can destroy if it is from a boy....

What a drop
to destroy
the way I do
me
and how you have made me
to be

what a different phase of being
and yet
why am I seeing
so much disconnect

and a need to protect
death and decay
having their way with each passing thought

not jealousy brought
but a recurring hurt
of not being enough
which is tough

because there is one that I love
more than I ever did the other
and yet it still smothers
my beating and anxious heart
which starts
and patters
what's the matter?

I ask
trying to bask in a moment of peace
a sweet release from the norm
but on comes the storm

not just that
but with a splat
drops are pouring
as the lives are warring
taking tiredness out on the other

yes my heart is smothered
Lord so much to do
and to say
and not seeming a way
please help light the way
cover me with your shade
help me see how I have been made
and who you are
let me not go far

amen.

(so thankful to be with a man)