What do you want your life to be?

I see my life
as a kid sitting on the stairs
as everyone dances
I don't dare to join

But that's who I used to be
the new me
is a different girl
whose life has been quite the whirl
with change after change
in the past 5 years

at first it was filled with tears
and wants, never fulfilled
but now its filled with strength
and grace and more of His will
it's more of a dance
haphazard at first
but then you'll carefully see
the intentionality

I don't want my life to be
time spent only for me
and so each day I selfishly fight
with all my might
against the urge to live for one
and now have just begun
to live for them

Them the people on the streets
who you turn or walk away so as not to meet
the ones who live in bungalows behind
in the tucked away places hard to find
or hidden
as if in this place, for your safety, entry is forbidden

but I see people rocking and sweeping and breathing
laughing and crying and needing
these people are good
these people are bad
they are happy and they are sad
just like you and me
and to see
to truly see them for who they are
and to go so far
as to

stop.

and wait a minute with them
when everything within
is telling you to run
so that you can finish and you can do
but do this
don't miss the beauty of a man
just because it doesn't fit
in a certain span
of time

I want my life to be
a moment spent with glee
or sorrow
but always looking forward to tomorrow
acknowledging
the beauty of reality
juxtaposed with its pain

wanting to heal and hear their complaints
to push them when they need it
and hold them when they don't
to say yes I will
or no I won't
but always

I love you
if that is all my life can be
then I will have lived maybe not happy

but joyfully. 

(This is the result of a run and too many thoughts, also finding new areas with new people- the forbidden places of Charlotte! Hope you have a great one!)