To Wait is to Do

Words

drop heavy on my heart

and yet

so quickly 

depart

how to help

how to express

how to give

and yet as I live

with each breath

that is

I feel something new

that drawing to do

towards something new

and towards anything but here

truly here

not lazy

not sleeping

here

breathing in the twirling air

the dragon breath of her pants

the kicks of his feet

the frustration from her running

and almost being hit for the umpteenth time

frustrated from the past

and not knowing 

or changing my eyes to see

so much frustration in me

that is what is here

what is near

like a crab trap buoy I float

things lie beneath and things above

but i

tethered

and slopped on

am stuck

and as muck is passed from the waves

to my head

I have to remember what You have said

I have to breathe

and believe

I have to bounce

and receive

and as the muck

slips on by

I know what it is to try

to do and to fail

to cry and to wail

but also to breathe and to do

and to give it up to You

and so as my dog

runs

while my heavy body

pulls and whines

the air hard to find

I choose to breathe and do

and give it up to You

maybe this special training

is something in parenting I'll do too ( : 

//

“I wait for the LORD,  my soul waits, and in his word I hope; my soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning, more than watchmen for the morning.”
      PSALMS 130:5-6