Heart Update

At 3 am, I awake to a cough. I know that cough. I drag myself out of slumber to peek around the corner of the bed. Tripp is heaving and I hear her throw up. I let myself lay down but something nags. I use my phone and see a bone. She had swallowed up the rawhide whole. I clean up the mess and then sit and comfort her. As I pet her fur I feel like a mom. Wide awake in the wee hours, my heart in tune to what it needs to do without the cost. Something inside of me has made the switch. It isn't anything I did. It's like God designed with pregnancy a change in emotion to include this must do attitude. There is no option, you have to do what you have to do.

We will see how that transpires with our baby boy.

I don't much get emotional but at moments I do. When I haven't felt him move in a long time and suddenly he kicks strongly at the too tight seat belt. Buddy, I feel it too! Things are too tight these days.

It's an amazing transition.

In the beginning I freaked out. We had just gotten a puppy and bought a house. We were in a class to become debt free. As Tyler drove to get the test and I took a shower, I prayed. I wouldn't let myself leave the shower until I was ready. I prayed knowing that the Lord had provided me with so much throughout my life and He wouldn't stop now. I prayed for His peace that passes understanding. I prayed He would give me hope when I need it most. My sweet provider has more than provided.

I then felt like I should wait for God to provide the things we need for our baby. The list of things we have been given is incredible. Including a stroller I prayed for specifically- a city mini stroller. We also have been given a pack and play, crib, rug, diaper changing pad, books, bottles, clothes, and so much more.

God also blessed Tyler with a wonderful job opportunity. A way to provide for our family so that we can be okay if I stayed home with our boy. On top of that we can slowly continue to pay off our debts. What a blessing.

All of this to say- God is good and has answered every prayer. It has and will continue to be a journey but our God is so sweet. Continuing to trust that He has a plan and we need only to rest and trust in Him.

Hope you all are well!

e

A Friend

Things happen
time fades
I slip back
into the familiar shade

as the transition progresses
pregnancy successes
no tears
just ready
steady
let's go ( :

and wouldn't you know
in walks a friend
and that's the end

for a moment

I see this man in front of me
so sweet
patient and kind
who has shown me into his mind
with little gestures
with meanings beyond

and I realize
how incredibly fond
I am of this place and what it means

a beautiful in between

a family of sorts
some in cohorts
others push back
but still with love there is so much slack

Darryl says hi
Robert offers help
Chelsea sings and laughs
and the kids, oh I can't start with that

friends are special
they don't even know
sometimes
it makes me sad to go